Time Change Rage

We had been doing so well in recent weeks that I'd thought we might be over Monster Man's anger issues.  Sure, he'd had his share of being upset over the things most kids get upset about - sibling rivalry, not getting his way, etc - but he still seemed to have gotten rid of the anger that tends to build up and then come barreling out of him almost in a fit of rage.

He didn't feel really well all weekend.  For the most part, he was fine.  He'd get upset about something and then start laying around.  Whenever he'd start laying down, upset, he'd spike a fever and start complaining of a headache and stomachache.  My hubby used to do the same thing as a child, kind of as a stress reaction, and it didn't take us long to figure out that was what was going on with Monster Man this weekend.  Once he got up and got moving, especially once he found something fun to do, his fever would drop and he'd be back to normal.

Between this and the time change, it was not much of a surprise that Monster Man was in such a bad mood this morning.  He had napped quite a bit over the weekend when he wasn't feeling well, but he could not seem to get to sleep last night when he was sent to bed for the night.  This morning, he dragged to get around and then had to be rushed to get out of the door before the bus arrived to pick him up.

He seemed to get upset over everything this morning.  I told him to make sure he got his jacket, he yelled that he knew and then glared at me.  I told him that he needed to make sure he had his backpack, he yelled that he already had it.  At one point, he got mad and sat on the steps because I told him not to stand with the front door open (didn't want him letting out the dog).  Then he refused to talk to me except to yell at me even more.  I was proud of him, though, because I saw him pick something up to throw it, and then he caught himself and put it down before he could act on impulse.

Unless you've seen Monster Man at his worse, or unless you've lived with someone with the same anger issues as Monster Man, you might easily pass it off as just being typical moodiness in a boy his age.  However, those who have experienced what I have with Monster Man realize that there is quite a difference between the two.

I am hoping he will be back to my happy little boy once he gets home from school today.

It's heartbreaking

Okay, I'll admit it. It's heartbreaking to see my happy-go-lucky little boy turn into the little boy with all the anxiety he has been experiencing. Monster Man's life has changed so much over the past year. While the anxiety is the worst of it for us, there are so many other changes that make my heart ache for him.

Monster Man turned 10 this year. As he's grown older, his hormones have started to change bit by bit. Maybe because of the hormones, but maybe still because of the new struggles he is facing in learning to live with his tics, he has started having horrible mood swings. It doesn't take much to make him angry these days. Some mornings, he's already yelling before he even makes it to the school bus. I know he doesn't mean to be so angry so much of the time, and he's often quick to apologize when he realizes that his temper is getting away from him, but it still saddens me to see how angry he is.

I've noticed that he seems to withdraw from us a little more than he used to, as well. Some days we have to practically beg him to come out of his room. He chooses to stay on his bed, reading a book (at least he's doing something of value with his time), rather than spending family time with us some nights. I've also noticed that he gets a spaced off look from time to time, like he's not completely there with us even when he is sitting right by us. Some days, I cry thinking of my Monster Man slipping away from us.

I know we all have many challenges ahead of us. Our faith in God will help us through.